There were a few realizations that brought me to creating my FulList. I listed them briefly on the “About” page, but wanted to give a more in-depth explanation of them:
Realization Number One: Life is short. You hear this everywhere and in so many different ways. One video in particular comes to mind as a great illustration of this fact: The Time You Have (In Jellybeans) – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOksW_NabEk. For some people, this fact elicits panic. It can be a rude awakening when the brevity of life starts to sink in. I choose to use it as motivation to not squander the little time that I have on Earth. It’s not easy though. Some days, I just want to binge-watch TV or spend all day engulfed in a video game or read a good book start to finish. Some days, it’s hard to even want to get out of bed. I started to accept these days as part of my rest time. I gain enjoyment and restoration from my lazy days, but I use the realization that life is short to motivate myself to complete items from my FulList. What you do for work comes into play with this too. More on that later. The biggest takeaway is that we should value the time that we have and to make sure that we find enjoyment in the things we do with our time.
Life is short. How short? Well, we don’t know for certain because life is also not guaranteed. Every day there are people who die instantly without any warning: car accident, ruptured brain aneurysm, misfired gun… Death could come at any moment. Sure, you could live in fear of everything and lead an extremely sheltered and cautious life, but the truth is, oftentimes there’s nothing you can do to prevent it. I’ve chosen to embrace the fact that we don’t have control of when we die and I use this fact to further motivate me to make the most of the time that I do have. Any day could be your last. Leave nothing unsaid, appreciate the moments that you are given in life, and choose to live each day as fully as you can.
Realization Number Two: You Are in Charge of Your Own Happiness. Who doesn’t want to be happy? Maybe Eeyore… but almost everyone will tell you that what they want most out of life is happiness. So many people see happiness as this unattainable thing that they have to work super hard for. They think that before they can be happy they need money and things and a relationship and a house, and, and, and. Not enough people have tried to learn how to create their own happiness from within. Being happy is a mental state. The human mind is very powerful. There are people who are able to survive things that no human should be able to physically survive. How? They’ve trained their minds to do so. In the same way, we can train our minds to be happy. It starts with changing the way you view the world. We have been conditioned to see life through a lens that has been created for us by our parents, teachers, politicians, friends, and the society around us. It’s not always a positive lens. Some people will have to work harder than others to reshape their perspectives, but it is possible to revise the way you perceive your world.
It took a long time for me to figure out how to internalize my happiness. I had to learn to set aside the negative opinions of others and know my own worth outside of gossip and comparisons. I trained myself to see the positives of any scenario, while still being realistic enough to handle things with a logical mind. The hardest struggle for me was to disregard what others were saying or thinking. I still very much respect the opinions of others, but I have learned to listen and try to hear the deeper meaning in what is being said rather than taking their words at face value and to be considerate without sacrificing what I know to be ethical. Everybody makes mistakes. It’s part of living. The only thing we can do is to do better next time. Let yourself make mistakes. Laugh at the embarrassing moments and know that you are human, just like the people that might be passing judgement on you. Care for your fellow humans, do your best every day and start training yourself to find the reasons to be happy. Over time, you will learn how to create and take charge of your own happiness from within.
Realization Number Three: Memories Are Greater Than Things. In 2011, a documentary called Happy was released and it helped to alter my perspective on monetary wealth. The film interviews people around the world with varying degrees of wealth, searching for what brings people happiness. They discover that money can indeed provide an increase in happiness, but only to a certain point. Many studies have been released showing that happiness is something that people can feel regardless of their external living situations. Some of the poorest people in the world are far more happy than some of the wealthiest. Money can buy comfort, which can increase happiness, but money alone cannot buy happiness.
I’m sure many of you have heard this piece of advice over the years: choose a career that you enjoy. It always seemed silly to me to waste time (especially having so little of it) in a job that you don’t get enjoyment from. I realize for some people they don’t really have an option and they have to accept whatever work they can find to provide for themselves and/or their families. My heart goes out to them and I hope they will someday get to choose to work at something that they find enjoyment in. Many of us are already there. We have options and some of us choose the highest paying position because we think the money from it will bring us happiness. How many years of your life will you sacrifice though working in a career that you hate? If you choose a career path you enjoy, your work will not feel like work and it will not be a waste of time all for monetary gain that will only bring minimal happiness.
One of my favorite quotes about this is: “Fill your life with experiences, not things. Have stories to tell, not stuff to show.” I’ll say it again, money can buy some things that can definitely increase your enjoyment of certain aspects of life. If you’re working a job you hate for years on end to attain this money though, then is it really worth it for the little time you have left for enjoyment? Chase what brings you joy, whether that’s family, travel, hobbies, a meaningful job, or just quality time with friends. The memories you create during these moments of enjoyment in your life will be worth far more to you when you reach the end of your life than a pile of money and a life filled with hateful work. Rarely is the moral of the story “and s/he lived happily ever after alone with all his/her money.” I realized early in my life that I cared far more for adventure than material items. So I strive to seek out joyful moments to build a wonderful collection of memories that will be my FulList Life.
I am constantly learning more about life and I don’t claim to have anywhere near all the answers, but I hope sharing what I’ve learned so far and some of the resources that I learned from will help you achieve a greater level of happiness for yourself. I am sharing my journey of Living my FulList Life through written word here as well as through videos on our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpHnd1KIfv_K3Byac_kY0Cw/featured
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Remember that life is a journey and we are all figuring it out as we go. Let’s help each other along the way and always strive to do our best.
LIVE YOUR FULLIST 